Body Acceptance Nirvana

I was just telling a friend this story, and I thought--it's pretty interesting! Maybe my blog buddies would like to hear it, too.

I grew up, of course, thinking that my curvalicious figure was too fat. Looking at the flat-tummied waifs on TV and film, I felt dumpy and large.

Then, I took West African dance in college. Our instructor, "Grandma," would tell the girls, "Be beautiful! Be ROUND!" It became clear that she, and the other Africans teaching us, thought the American ideal of womanly beauty way too thin. It's not like morbid obesity is considered attractive in Ghana, either, but they like some meat on women's bones.

I realized then that my body was considered the perfect shape in much of the world. That the proper-size body was nothing more than a cultural construct. And that I would be one hot mama in Africa.

In fact, I did visit Lisbon for five days at the tail end of my study abroad in Greece. At least in 1999, Lisbon had a lot of immigrants from Portugal's former African colonies. I could not walk down the street without being followed by an African man. Sometimes it was a little unnerving, but nonetheless, it verified my thesis.

Since meeting the Ghanaians in college, I've liked my body, not seeing it as too fat, too large, or in any way embarrassing. I think this is overall a good thing. On the other hand, it did keep me from trying to lose weight when I probably should have.

Recently a lovely, very attractive friend confided that she felt upset because she'd gained some weight. I advised her to buy new clothes so that she would feel good about herself.